As of right now, the knights are separated into three classes: Storm, Sky, and Guardian. Storm and Sky class are elite classes that are only in the south kingdom (since they're trained after the war). Guardian class, however, is divided between the north and the south as a result of the civil war.

So far, I have completed the cast of the smaller elite class, Storm and Sky. Storm class have four member, while Sky class have eight. Guardian class is expected to have over 50. Members of Storm and Sky class are generally around 18-25 of age, while Guardian have a much wider range of 18-60.

Rough sketch of Storm Class in this order: Nightgale the Wind Storm, Seo the Flame Storm, Ramiel the Thunder Storm, Nightbane the Lightning Storm

Part 1 of Sky class: Dawnick the Twilight, Sorren the Dusk, Rosetta the Stormy

Part 2 of Sky class: Nightfall the Dark, Lapis the Azure, Celice the Crystal, Nina the Crimson

Part 3 of the Sky class: Elios the Hazel

Everyone looks like Parsee.

Now without the Touhou reference. Everyone looks the fucking same.

>>28
You mean hair/eye color being the same? I've decided to make their whole race have dirty blonde hair and green eyes. I'm seriously not a huge fan of random/unnatural hair colors.

>>29

Then you'll have a bunch of same-looking guys. And if your drawing skills aren't good enough, or the reader isn't paying much attention, confusions might arise.

Also, aryan supremacy.

>>29
For a moment I wondered if they were all supposed to be clones of each other or mass-manufactured people (e.g. Brave New World) or something.

>>30
Hence why I am looking for another artist to help out. Another source of input should help bring out stronger contrast in each character.

Also, Aryan have blue eyes if I remember correctly.

>>32

Yes, the aryan part was a joke. Still, >>31 sounds like a good idea if you want them all to be the same.

The "southern knight", or the main character, is in fact Nightbane. Shortly after he finished his training, he was deployed with his brother Nightgale, Nightbane was betrayed and attacked by his brother for their father's inheritances. Nightbane survived, however, and hided under the fake name Metal.

He would remain in the city of Ice Fortress (Icefort for short, named since it's a literally a fortress with walls of snow and rocks in the valley of a mountain), waiting for a chance to carry out his revenge against his brother (who was stationed there). While he waits, he had encountered a few knights, while some are good nature, others are rude and abusive to the citizens. In an act of self defense, he killed a knight --- also the first man he killed. In order to justify his mistake, he would attack and kill any knight he thought to be unworthy of being a knight (mainly the ones that abuses the citizens) in the name of "justice", and is not willing to correct his mistakes until later on. While murder is generally not well accepted in the society, the citizens were grateful that Metal had slain the "bad" knights, and regarded him as a hero. Metal, himself, however, knows he is no hero --- he is a bloody murderer who even killed his own brother.

My quality is going downhill now since I am uploading work I've done long time ago, long before I got my tablet, but this is the only decent work I've done for Metal.

The left is Lapis, the right is Nightbane/Metal, about three years into the story.

>>33
No, I don't intend on making them the same. I'll make sure to give them contrast as I develop it more.

Nano the King of the North/King of the Wolves

She is the only daughter of the former king of the North, but she was thrown into the wild because her father detested having a girl to be the heir to the throne. Although raised in the northern wasteland by the wolves, she's capable of communicating with both wolves and humans without problems. Her manners might be strange and often seen as a tomboy, but her courage and skills in combat are unquestionable. Due to her command over the wolves, she's often referred as "Alpha", or the leader of the wolves.

After the death of her father, she returns to the capital. At the age of 13, she reclaimed the throne that was rightfully her with brute force. She later names herself the "King of the North", and "King of the Wolves". With armies of knights and wolves at her command, she waits patiently with her sight is set on destruction of the southern kingdom.

In the story, she would "scout" Icefort early on with a small party, turning the city upside down. Metal and the defenders would surprise attack Alpha's cities in return, but only ending up in a confrontation with her. She could've ended Metal there, but she recognizes the strength and "uses" of Metal, and kept him alive. She would make pacts with Metal, exchanging the safety of the city of Icefort for information. For the duration of the story, she would continue to bribe Metal, attempting to make him change side.

>>29
If you would like to keep the natural hair color in the characters, I'd suggest to at least use different tones to the colors selected.

Please take a look at this, OP. Everybody has the same hair and eye color. Yet they all look different. You really need to pay attention to the details:
-Most importantly, the facial expression. Almost every single character in your sketches has the exact same expression. Not everybody has the same expression in a given situation; one person has a different on his face than another random person. The expressions should fit the character's personality.
-Hair styles. You've obviously already tried varying it a bit, but it can be more varied. Almost everybody currently has the same hair length and style. If you take a look at the character designs in this picture, you'll notice they all have slightly different hairstyles.
-Size and shape of eyes and eyebrows. If you look carefully, you'll notice subtle difference in eye styles, eyebrow thickness, eyebrow position (see 'facial expressions' part above), etc.
-Shape and size of mouth. Also partially in the 'facial expressions' category, you can see that in the picture, those with the mouth not obscured have slightly different mouths. The bored looking one has a very slight -, while the happy girl has a huge :D on her face. This kind of difference can tell a lot about a character.
-Shape and size of nose, since you seem to be including noses. You have them, so use them to make your characters more different.
-Accesories. Can be the easy way out to lazy character designers. On the pic, we see various scarves, hair ornamentals, bandages, glasses (I'll leave aside the accesories not on the face - the clothes in your sketches seem fine). You might argue that these aren't fitting for your story, but you can do the same for scars, tattoos, helmets, etc.

Lastly, you can also vary the size of head and/or body, both in height and in width - one character can be more muscular than another, fat perhaps, taller than other characters, shorter, and you can change the stance - relaxed stance, tense stance, slightly bending forward, etc.

Various techniques to make character designs more unique. There are probably many more, I'm no artist, let alone a character designer, but you should be able to differentiate your characters with these techniques. Having unique character designs is extremely important if you're dealing with a large cast and don't want to resort to unrealistic hair colors and the like.

>>38
Nice example! It seems like I am only having that problem with guys; I'm doing slightly better in that field with the girls than the guys. I'll be sure to work on it.

So anyways, any writefriend/drawfriend interested in joining this project?

>>39
Can't do both, I just like watching people make OC. Anyway, as mentioned in the 404ed thread, you won't get much attention due to our already-low user base. Wait for the next OC thread in /jp/, then go pimp your stuff.

Hey there, I'm going to give you some honest feedback on what I think about your idea.

>like The Ravages of Time and Vinland Saga

Oufits need more armor, designs should have a warrior-edge to them. All your designs look very bishounen. Look through the vikings of Vinland saga, or even take a glance at Berserk outfits. To help with characters, change their body builds per character, it'll help a ton. I suggest some other natural hair colors, unless they're all Claymores I think its a tad unrealistic to make them all blonde.

>As more knights were trained, humans finally reclaimed the open plains

This sentence gives me the idea that instead of having crazy powerful wolves since the dawn of man, something could have happened that made man regress back into a more medieval time era and shut them away. Let me be more specific: I personally don't like the idea of crazy powerful "wolves". To me it sounds cheesy. I do however think it would be interesting to have an advanced society thrown into ruin by some sort of powerful force and having remnants of the past remain while they are forced to fight from square one as medieval warriors to reclaim their world.

>Now, the story revolves around a southern knight who gained control of a minor city by chance. He would train normal men to help defend, raid other cities (friend's AND foe's), kill countless men on the battlefield or secretly, and makes secret pacts with friends and enemies in order to keep the city alive

This doesn't sound like it's about the wolves anymore. I'm curious to know your characters main goals and where the story would be heading - that is, what the reader as well as the creator seeks to achieve by finishing the story as well as setting it in such a world.

It will be a Shounen manga where enemies keep appearing, all that happens is that the good guys defeat the bad guys and the story never really goes anywhere.

Or not.

>>41
Great feedback! This is exactly what I need!

>Oufits need more armor

The "fur" they're wearing are wolf furs. Like previously stated, they are slashing-proof (immune to swinging attacks). Knights were trained to counter wolves, so mobility is a higher concern than defense (since the impact from a "hit" from a wolf would probably break bone or knock someone out). Therefore, I purposely avoided "armoring" them.

>I think its a tad unrealistic to make them all blonde

You might have a point there, but think of it this way: let's say you're in China during 1000 BC. What are the chances of you walking down the street and finding someone that doesn't have black hair (or white for elders)? Chances are slim to none. If you do find one, he/she is likely to be considered as a freak of nature/outcast. Either way, I could add a few characters with different hair/eye color in. I'm in need for a lot more characters anyways.

>instead of having crazy powerful wolves since the dawn of man

You're probably right, I should've wrote "claim" instead of "reclaim". My mistake there.

>This doesn't sound like it's about the wolves anymore

It's not really about wolves in the first place, those are just background settings. Wolves are still around during the time of the story, but most are away from civilization (or up north with the northern king).

>your characters main goals

As for main goal, his original goal is to find and act out his revenge on his brother. But after he completed that, he couldn't get over the fact that he just killed his own brother, and attempt to justify his actions by pretending to be avatar of justice. Not to sound cheesy, but he tries to make the world better. Like himself, his reasons would continue to develop; originally he plans on getting rid of hereditary systems (so no useless person would be king) and all the unworthy knights, then he wanted to create a world where the future generations won't need to stain their hands with blood (he doesn't want his daughter to walk the path he did).

>>42
Unlike stuff like Bleach or Naruto, I do plan on killing off the "good" guys. I don't think Shounen allows the good guys to be permanently killed. Even Metal would die close to the end, but the story doesn't end with his death.

As for "if it goes anywhere", I'm sure it does. The world changes, characters change, and a boatload of moral here and there.

>>43
Nothing wrong with having the fur act as armor. My issue is that they look far too modern casual. If you want to go for that look, that's fine, I just think of characters living in a world like this being more battle-ready. Drew a really, really fast sketch of your first character to hopefully convey what I mean.

>What are the chances of you walking down the street and finding someone that doesn't have black hair

Asians are a bit different, seeing as they all have black hair. If you're going with caucasians there have been various natural colors since way back when. If you want all blonde, then by all means. However, your characters will lack diversity due to this. Even Claymore gets stagnant with having so many blonde haired silver-eyed characters.

>It's not really about wolves in the first place, those are just background settings

Understood. I guess I was just trying to find why you placed them in such a world. Fantasy worlds are awesome to expand on since they allow for reason and purpose for having that particular world and building onto it.

>his original goal is to find and act out his revenge on his brother. But after he completed that, he attempted to justify his actions by pretending to be avatar of justice

The main point sounds a little weak. In revenge stories the climax tends to be the revenge act itself. The after story feels like it's lacking in a strong reason for the reader to continue till the end.

>I don't think Shounen allows the good guys to be permanently killed

Death isn't what makes a shounen a shounen. A lot of characters die for good in shounen. But yes, your idea does sound mainly like a shounen.

But anyway, this idea doesn't really sound like my cup of tea. I'll be in and out to give you feedback if you need it though.

>>44
Yea, I see what you mean. I can totally get the medieval-like feel from your sketch. I guess I'll need to work hard on my drawing skills.

>In revenge stories the climax tends to be the revenge act itself.

Actually, the "after story" is actually the main story. The "revenge story" is still character intro/setting building, since it's really short. If I were to start drawing, it'd start with him killing his brother, right on the first page/chapter.

I definitely want your help. Drop by as often as possible.